Mark your calendars. Tomorrow is the big day when the above mentioned people will hug trees that someone else planted, berate us for using Styrofoam, and claim life on this planet is about to end due to man-made global warming.
Carefully scrubbed from the Wikipedia Earth Day page, is one of the masterminds behind Earth Day who was an active participant in the first Earth Day celebration in Philadelphia (1970), Ira Einhorn.
Ira, that peace promoting wunderkind, earned his Master Composting Certificate by killing his girlfriend, Holly Maddux, and carefully composting her in a trunk that sat on his porch for 18 months before discovery.
His Composting Certificate was subsequently rescinded when the neighbors complained of a foul smell emanating from Ira's abode. Proper composting should not smell foul.
The fun loving tree-hugger skipped bail and headed off to Europe where he resided in France until he was finally captured in 1997. After a lengthy extradition process he was finally brought back to the U.S. in 2001 and is presently serving life without parole.
Please take a moment to say a prayer for Holly on Earth Day. Thank you.
Enough about Ira.
Closely aligned with Earth Day is Agenda 21, the UN sponsored program that seeks to end all rural living and pack us all into sparkly bright cities while ending our private property rights. Can you say
I don't know about where you live, but the some of the cities that are most invested in this are some of the nastiest. On my last trip to St. Paul, Minnesota (a breeding ground and haven for all things greenie-weenie), I was appalled at how dirty it is. Oh sure, take a drive down the River Road where the runners almost outnumber the cars and everything looks fairly nice. Drive two blocks away and it's a different story.
Meanwhile, those of us who are rural dwellers are planting trees, tending our gardens, conserving our energy, and doing proper composting - not making Soylent Green.
We're ranching, raising chickens and pigs, and growing all that green stuff you city dwellers scarf up in huge quantities.
So next time you encounter one of these latte drinking elitist snobs, ask them where the milk, chocolate and other goodies came from so they could sit around at a sidewalk table and deride those who actually do the work.
Ask them why it's okay to avail themselves of a plastic umbrella while telling us to carry our groceries in a cloth bag.
Ask them how much of their food they actually grew and how many trees they actually planted.
Ask them why they don't get off their lazy asses and sweep the curb in front of their house instead of waiting for the city to power up a gas hog of a street sweeper to do it for them.
Ask them why they don't hang their clothes out to dry in the summer.
Ask them why they're using a snow-blower instead of a shovel in the winter and why they don't turn off their air conditioning in the summer.
And finally, ask them if they've always been this stupid and arrogant or if it was a recent development.
Heading out to the laundromat to wash rugs that will be hung out to dry and pick up an Arbor Day seedling at the library to plant on my property.
Previous snarky posts for Earth Day...