Ordinarily, I don't bother to get into internet "discussions". I find them pointless and a waste of time. Blogging, IMHO, is a way to dispense information or have light-hearted exchanges. One thing people like Stacy McCain, Terry over at Abbey-Roads, Cathy of Alex, et al, have taught me, however, is that sometimes you just must stand up for the truth, particularly when you are attacked.
Yesterday, Stacy posted a piece addressing why purity before marriage is still the best path, and why some women are having a hard time finding a mate. Did he express his views as I would have? No. But that's why he's Stacy and I'm not. It was a great post, and it drove home the central point of "why buy the cow, when you can get the milk for free." That saying has been around a long time. I heard it when I was a very young woman, and it's as true today as it was then.
I left a comment thinking it was fluffy and kind of cute. Another commenter didn't think so.
I tell young women the way to a man's heart is really through his stomach. Feed him well and he'll follow you like a puppy.
And as for the rest of what you said - right on.
Girls were taught this in "the old days" by their mothers. It was true then and it's still true. And, no - you don't have to be all "churchy" about it either.
My mom was so smart that when I thought I wanted a car, she sat me down and told me to check out who was riding around with the girls who had their own cars. It was other girls. Hot girls without cars had boys to drive them around. And, boy oh boy, was she ever right. I never walked anywhere - ever!
Nothing in that comment struck me as too inflammatory, but this is what javelineer said:
I have strong views on the subject. Read Adrienne's post above. Women are systematically taught to scam men. They do this by leading men on sexually, tempting the sucker to pony up the cash. This amounts to sexual dishonesty as a strategy. Yes, we teach girls how to be liars from an early age. We also teach girls that it's perfectly ethical to lie - so long as it gets her the greenback. Our women have become sexual con-girls, and sure enough a sucker is born every minute.This sort of ticked me off. Not wanting to jump to conclusions and possibly start a flame war on Stacy's blog, I said:
With the sexual revolution, men do not need to chase vayjajay. It's abundant, high quality, and free. Today, in every major city in America, women out earn men. Yet still men are told to pony up the cash. With the feminine fraud so blatant, and the vayjayjay value so low - many, many men have come to realize that our women are simply prostitutes who barter rather than trade in straight cash.
I won't even get into the vayjayjay-begging chivalry advocates. Suffice it to say, we've let women define manhood from romance novels. The novels were bad. But the idea was even worse.
15-30% of children born in marriages are not sired by the husband. With that kind of venal incontinence rampant among our women, why not just eat from the smorgasbord. Being single is less fulfilling than being happily married, but it's more fulfilling than being a cuckold. Marriage is, by and large, for suckers these days. I fully support the marriage strike. By and large, women aren't worth it.
I agree with the conceive-believe-achieve philosophy. I also know that not every conception is believable.
javelineer - before I respond, I wish to clarify what you said and make absolutely and 100% sure I understood you.And he said:
1. You're claiming I was systematically taught to "scam" men
2. That I led men on sexually
3. I lied for money
"Adrienne, no, no, and no. I just wanted people to read your post before they read mine. Do please respond."Well, all righty then. I will respond.
You claim women are systematically taught to not only scam men, but to lie and consider it ethical. I'm not quite sure how remaining pure before marriage constitutes a "scam." Don't you think having sex with an untold number of men before finally settling down with your soul mate is a much bigger scam and lie?
You continue with this: "With the sexual revolution, men do not need to chase vayjajay. It's abundant, high quality, and free." I would be willing to bet the farm that women who have a reputation for sleeping with any and all comers (no pun intended), are not considered "high quality" by most men. Check out any high school locker room and see which girls are being talked about. I'll guarantee you it's not the girls who refused to put out at the beer bust the night before.
As to "15-30% of children born in marriages are not sired by the husband" - where did you get that figure? It occurs to me that you may have been a victim of a wife who strayed. If so, maybe you should have eaten off a "different smorgasbord" as you refer to women.
Later you responded to Right Guy's comment and said:
The Right Guy wrote, "I also tell them bluntly what the facts of life are, what young men are like, and what the right thing to do is."Since Right Guy hasn't had time to respond to that challenge, allow me to jump in and clarify. Men and women were designed by our Creator to be different. Don't want to drag God into this? Well, fine. We can leave God out of it for now. Following the science of human reproduction will get us to the same place.
Pray tell. What are young men like? what are young women like?
Men are hard-wired to reproduce. It's a dang good thing because otherwise, the human race would have been extinct a long time ago. Women, on the other hand, are hard-wired to care for their offspring, much like a good dog or cat.
When men and women have sex, a hormone called oxytocin is released - more so in women than in men. This is sometimes referred to as the "bonding hormone." It is also released when women are in labor, and when they nurse. It ensures that the woman won't just drop her young in the woods and head off for the next fraternity beer bust, which could also lead to extinction, and it ensures that she also bonds to her partner.
This is why a young lady thinks she's in love, while a young man, eager to live up to his biological imperative, is not only bragging in the locker room the day following all that sex, but also looking around for his next conquest.
Stacy wisely stated in his article, "By repeated thoughts and actions, people's minds become accustomed to one sort of behavior, one sort of sexual ideation. The nature of the human mind is such that our minds can be trained to respond to stimuli in a patterned way, which is true not only in sex, but in eating, writing, talking, etc."
We live in a culture that has repeatedly lied to women and to men. A culture that has told us having sex outside of marriage is not only ok, but healthy. Our movies and TV programs have made a joke out of marriage, demeaned women, insulted the intelligence of men, and created a world where crude behavior is the norm.
Javelineer, since you believe women are liars, scammers, sexual con-girls, prostitutes, guilty of venal incontinence, and marriage is for suckers, your decision to fully support a marriage strike, is probably very wise.
That being said, take the time to read Do Not Blame Barack, by Selwyn Duke. It sheds more light on this "conversation."
"Contrary to what my title indicates, I probably judge Barack Obama more harshly than most reading this page. I don't think he is just a misguided ideologue or merely a creature of expediency. I believe, practically speaking, he is an evil man. That is to say, while he is largely ignorant like so many others, he has developed an affinity for evil. He mistakes it for good."
"Yet, to be blunt, Obama doesn't alarm me as much as the average American. To explain why, I'll present something Roman philosopher and statesman Marcus Tullius Cicero said 2000 years ago when lamenting Julius Caesar's rise to dictator:" read the rest
At Adrienne dePitera: Secret Sunday