Tuesday, November 20, 2018

Welcome to the season of stress and anger...

no - not politics.  The "holidays."

Yesterday I hit our Costco at 10 minutes after opening and the parking lot was already jammed.  Living in a relatively small town vs a Los Angeles, Manhattan, or Houston, everyone was polite, chatty, and generally having an okay time of it.

We veterans of the store even managed to not smack the shoppers up side the head who were navigating the dairy and produce rooms in the wrong direction.


The MSM is already predicting higher than normal amounts of car traffic.  Anyone who boards a plane at this time of year, in particular with toddlers, needs to be slapped with a 5150 post haste.


Every year when I was doing hair I would have to listen to the complaints of women decrying that the Christmas cookie baking had yet to commence.  I stayed silent for years, until I finally started saying, "You know, you don't have to make cookies."

"Oh, but my family expects me to," sayeth the stressed out woman.

"Um - no they don't.  Most of them hate your crappy cookies slathered with red and green over-sugary icing and festooned with little shiny bits of hard glittering thingys, and couldn't care less if you didn't make them. Make some chocolate chip or oatmeal cookies and call it a day. Or (be still my beating heart) buy some cookies."

Harsh, but true.

Unreasonable Expectations

Starting with Thanksgiving many people have expectations of a Norman Rockwell family gathering.  And every year people discover anew that their family is as nuts as the most dysfunctional families who ever committed mass murder.

Face that fact early on and life will go much better for you.


The most over-rated bird to ever grace the dinner table.  There's a reason we smother the the thing in gravy.  And every year the Butterball hot line is swarmed with stressed people with questions about cooking their turkeys.

How to Cook a Turkey

Throw some butter on it, stick it in the oven and take it out when it's done.  Hopefully, that will be before 8 pm when everyone is drunk and filled with celery sticks, and chips and dips.

As for me, I'll be jamming a turkey breast in my Instant Pot and eating luscious moist turkey in 30 minutes.

Side Dishes

Dressing, potatoes (you may have sweet and regular), rolls, and one veggie.

Make them all the day before.


And set your table the night before too.

Skip the Angst

This year vow to not set your expectations too high.  Keep entertaining simple. Remember your family is crazy.

I won't be around much for the next few days.  Tomorrow is history club and Thursday is a day of thanksgiving.

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