Sunday, June 27, 2010

Protect your reputation! Dear Abby, please help...


Dear Abby,


I am a crack dealer in Paducah, KY who has recently been diagnosed as a carrier of HIV virus. My parents live in Bowling Green.  One of my sisters lives in Taylorsville and is married to a transvestite.  My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana. They are financially dependent on my other two sisters, who are prostitutes in Louisville.  I have two brothers: one is currently serving a non-parole life sentence at Eddyville for the murder of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with his three children.

I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute, who currently lives in Lexington. She is still a part time "working girl".  All things considered, my problem is this.  I love my fiancĂ©e and look forward to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally open and honest with her.

Should I tell her about my cousin from Ashland, who is an Obama supporter?


Signed,
Worried About My Reputation


Gleefully and without shame stolen from my friend Pops over at Conservative Outrage. (a man imbued with more than his fair share of common sense and everyday kindness)  

2 comments:

Old Bob said...

Abby says, Dear "Worried": Certainly not! Have you no shame at all?

paramedicgirl said...

Ha! That was a good laugh!