I just had to steal this lock, stock, and cocktail stirrer from our very own clever Angela over at Where Angels Go...
"Celebrity cocktails - it's one of my favorite junky things to read on the internet. For example, here is one I lifted off the internet: the Sarah Jessica Stinger - in a cocktail shaker combine two parts of the color pink, one part water of the fountain of youth (if out of stock, Botox does the trick), and three parts of any beauty product or perfume that you sponsor. Shake well and pour into a size 6 Manolo Blahnik stiletto. Drink with your girlfriends while divulging your sexual escapades."
"I thought it would be fun to make up both celebrity and blogger cocktails or food dishes. For instance:"
The Kate Gosselin Sour - combine one part blonde hair dye, one shrill voice and 8 little children and dump over a soon-to-be-ex husband. Oh - and add a good dose of Angostura bitters! Drink chilled with your lawyer.
The Terry (Nelson) Collins - mix equal parts oil paint, acrylic and pastels. Shake well and serve in a Lalique vase.
The Cathy Alexander - combine some crazy dreams with lake trout, bread with shotgun shells, cook over a campfire while sipping a martini.
The Crescat Casserole - skip the food and go straight for the beer!
The Larry D BBQ special - marinate hockey pucks in some beer. While they are sitting, BBQ up some T-bone steaks. Remove hockey pucks from marinade, drink beer and substitute DingDongs for the pucks so the boys have something to eat. (Pucks can be reused this winter.)
Pasta Gigli a la Adrienne- no booze here, but this dish takes 12 steps. It consists of lily shaped pasta, lots and lots of hairspray, lipstick, perfume, dangly earrings and common sense! Top with spaghetti sauce.
Tara-misu - because we soak the lady fingers in espresso! Top with mascarpone and grated chocolate. Chill in a Salt Lake City snowbank.
The Luscious Laura - a delightful combo of grit, red-eye gravy and a savory slice of ham.
The Gemlet - wipe the rim of gigantic margarita glass with lots and lots of salt. Pour in the driest vermouth you can find. Serve with a folded lace mantilla on the side as a napkin.
The Digi-dog - not to be confused with her darling Josie! - a baseball stadium hot dog (ask if she prefers Shea or Yankee) topped with sauerkraut and corned beef. Serve with a side of .45 s.
The Chris-wich - a double decker deli sandwich, combining a sprinkle of Jones Beach sand, black and white cookies, a kosher dill, and a New York steak. Serve on a TV tray while watching the news.
Five Alarm Chile Adoro - a staple at the firehouse! Place six gallons of jabanero peppers in a fireproof pot. Stir in some cheese and 10 gallons of kidney beans, 3 gallons of onions and 7 gallons of tomatoes. Garnish with a fire hose or two and have your insurance adjusters phone number on hand. Warning - nuns may need to remove their veils and wimples to eat this.
The Ward Nine - combine the cutest baby in the world with two adoring parents. Add a dash of giggles and lots of hugs. This dish is already sweetened - no need to add sugar.
Thanks Angela!!
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